Assertiveness is a useful train that can make people feel much more empowered in their lives and help them shape those lives in the way they want to. Of course, being assertive doesn’t mean being aggressive or domineering, but instead, it’s about expressing your thoughts, feelings, and needs in a confident way while also making sure you think about others at the same time.
While being assertive is a good thing, it can also be a difficult thing to get right, which is why it’s worth learning more about it so you can be a great role model for your kids. Read on to find out more.
If you’re not a naturally assertive person (as many people aren’t), then it’s a good idea to start with small things and then gradually work your way up to bigger ones. So you might start with letting a member of the waiting staff know that your order isn’t right so they can fix it, and gradually work your way up to hiring a professional medical malpractice lawyer so you can hold medical staff accountable for something that went wrong.
If you start small, every successful piece of assertive behavior you go through will boost your confidence and give you more knowledge about how to go about being as assertive as possible in all situations in your life, and in the end, you’ll always be able to stand up for yourself, which is an ideal way to be a good role model for your kids.
Use ‘I’ Statements
‘I’ statements are a big part of being assertive, and using them more is a great habit to get into because it’s a way of getting your point across without sounding too aggressive or confrontational. So you might originally have said something like, “You always interrupt me,” but you can change this to be more like, “I get annoyed when I’m interrupted during our conversations.”
You can hear the difference right away, and by using ‘I’ statements, you’re actually taking more ownership over your own emotions, and you’re starting a conversation where you can have a discussion rather than coming across as though you’re accusing someone of something.
Set Clear Boundaries
Being assertive (in a good way) means you’ll need to work out how to set boundaries and keep them in place. Talk to those around you about your limits and your expectations for what you can do and what you need them to do, and everyone will be on the same page, and it will be easier to keep your boundaries in place.
Not only will having boundaries help you when it comes to being assertive (because you’ll only actually have to be assertive if someone crosses the line), but it can also help you be a role model for your kids because it shows them what they need to do in their own lives.
Manage Your Emotions
When you want to be assertive, you need to manage your emotions because when you feel upset, anxious, or angry, you won’t be able to put your point across well, and you won’t come across as confident either.